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New Year Resolutions: How to stick to them

T’is the season to start thinking about becoming a newer and improved version of ourselves. As midnight chimes through on the 31st of December 2016 many of us pledge to commit to a cacophony of new and different things. These new ways of being include to lose weight, gain weight, find a partner, get divorced, earn more money, get a new job, quit smoking and the list goes on.

 

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We are resolute in our intention that this year it will be different. This year is the year we are more than ever committed to stick to the resolution. Come hell or high water! Our intention is signalled through our high-pitched intentions and persuasive ways we seek to reassure both ourselves and others that this is our year. This year it will happen. We pledge to stick to the diet for more than the few days until the first weekend of January. Or to not drink until the whole of January is over.  We will not eat any chocolate for the entire year or even for the rest of our lives. Regardless if it’s green and black 72%. We are D O N E.  It’s game over.

 

Forgot the resolutions. They don’t work. Santa’s also not real.

 

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There’s a significant difference between goal setting and new year resolutions. The later I wouldn’t bother with.  Why? Because people who make resolutions don’t stick to them. Why? Because a resolution is like a boat with no engine or oars. How so? These types of pseudo goals are generally fear filled, emotional based choices that serve to create a feeling of lack vs opportunity. They are superficial and without any real substance. Substance? Yes. For a goal to become real and achievable we are required to look for the juice. The resonance. The core deep inside of you reason why your goal is so important.

 

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Let’s take the scenario of you choosing to lose weight starting at midnight 2016. So, what’s different this time? You’ve tried a thousand times before I’m assuming. The public pledges on Facebook from you that scream; this year will be different; they clearly are not working as you’re back again with the same stories.  Maybe not surprising to you as it’s obvious by doing the same thing year after year you’re getting no different results.  To affect change, we need to do something different.  We need to locate the engine and oars in the boat. We do this by reminding ourselves what’s the deep inside of us motivation? The reason you are choosing to eat healthy? The reason you want to give up smoking. The reason you want to earn more money. Dig deep. What we you come up with needs to be unique, resonant and perfect for you.  Saying it’s to look good is superficial and top line. You need to crack the surface and look deeper inside. Meditate. Sit in nature. No technological distractions. No fear filled responses e.g. I want to lose weight as my husband will fancy me again. Sit in your power. The power of love and kindness to self. I recently hired a personal trainer and explained I wanted to lose weight. He laughed and told me not to waste his time. He reminded me I was 43 and he was sure I had said this same story a thousand times to both myself and other trainers. Of course, he was correct. He pissed me off (my ego was at play) but he was right. So, I dug deeper inside of me to access my engine. From a place of self-love, I sought to access my why.  And eventually with patience my reason popped into my head. I have never in my life worn a bikini and in six months’ time have planned two Caribbean holidays. We discussed how I’d imagine feeling in that bikini. My thoughts were so resonate I created goose bumps.  Every time I now want to waver from my goal I remember my reason why. I want to serve my body and mind with wholesome and clean thoughts, experiences and food.  All my fuel for a fun filled fulfilled life.

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So, create your goals/ resolutions right now.

 

Be clear on your why

 

Set a time frame

 

Hold yourself accountable with regular updates to people who care you live your dreams.

 

Happy holidays.

 

 

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1 Comment so far

  1. Mark

    My first thought was, Melissa in a bikini, that would sufficiently motivate me to stick to a resolution! The second thought took me back to 1995: I hear you’re losing weight again Mary Jane/ Do you ever wonder who you’re losing it for? (Alanis Morissette).

    I made a New Year resolution years ago, to not make New Year resolutions. If you want something, if really want it, why do you need the pretext of New Year to do something about it? And as you say, they invariably disintegrate, perhaps because you don’t want it enough.

    You can have the best Sat-Nav in the world, but it’s useless unless you know where you want to get to.

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